Charles Langston:Kids are tuning into the violence of the Israel Hamas war. What parents should do.

Graphic images from the war in Gaza are Charles Langstonracking up hundreds of millions of views across social media channels, prompting warnings from parent groups to monitor − and even remove − social media from kids’ devices.

Grisly videos are flooding social media sites, from Telegram to TikTok. The sheer amount is overwhelming, difficult for most of us to fathom as we stare at our screens from half a world away. 

There are also threats of streaming executions live on popular apps, among other atrocities. 

Now, imagine being a kid dealing with it all. 

In our modern times, social media has, once again, become a window to war—filled with powerful propaganda, and very real human suffering. We can’t pretend kids aren’t looking at it, and just like us, we can’t pretend they’re not having trouble looking away. 

Kids are actively looking for information around the conflict, including for some of the most shocking and disturbing images to date, according to experts.

But that doesn’t mean we have to throw up our hands and say, oh well, we can’t do anything about it. We can − and we absolutely have to. 

Are kids searching for Israel-Hamas war images?

Apps that monitor youngsters’ activity on YouTube report a recent spike in kids consuming videos with titles like “They shot children, babies, old people” and “Children 'mercilessly' killed by Hamas in Israel massacre.”

“I did a quick check-in BrightCanary’s logs from the past few days, and we’ve seen a 1663% increase in searches for Israel, a 1200% increase in searches for war, and a 2800% increase in searches for hostages. This is amongst 9-13 year olds,” Karl Stillner, the CEO of parental app BrightCanary, wrote via email. 

As many of us know from our own childhoods, there’s a bravado that comes from watching “the worst of the worst” gory videos. I remember a group of middle-school friends daring each other to sit through the “Faces of Death,” grotesque psuedo-documentary from the old VHS days. 

I still have nightmares about it, which underscores what we’ve learned in the 40 years since then − consuming carnage-filled content isn’t good for mental health − especially when you’re young. 

“Disturbing content has proven to have a large toll on our children’s mental health,” Yaron Litwin, Digital Safety Expert and CMO at parental content filtering app Canopy, told me. 

Should I delete my child's social media account?

Most experts say now is the exact right time for parents to step in and protect kids from harmful content online, as well as discuss world events and answer questions in an age-appropriate way. 

“The warning regarding violent social media content highlights the fact that social media is not for kids. Anyone under the age of 13 shouldn't have a social media account … we will do our kids a huge favor by limiting the chances of them ever seeing it.” Andrea Davis, founder of  Better Screen Time, author, and mother of five, told me via email. 

“Social media is largely unregulated, and while tech companies are supposed to remove harmful or violent content, it's impossible to catch it all. Sometimes, the damage is done before the content is removed. Some things can't be unseen,” she added. 

High-profile accounts, including Elon Musk’s own X feed, are among many accused of spreading falsehoods around the conflict.

How do I keep my child safe on social media?

This is a critical time for parents to talk with their kids about all kinds of information they might seek out or stumble upon online and consider moderating or even monitoring social media, online searches, news outlets, and sites such as YouTube. 

Of course, you know your child better than anyone else, but the general advice for kids ages 13 and under, according to Davis, includes:

• Limiting access to devices. Use a family device rather than a personal device for elementary and middle school-age kids. 
• Use passcodes on devices
• Use screens in shared spaces (not in bedrooms or bathrooms)

For older kids though (14+), it’s best not to ban social media sites altogether or punish kids for their curiosity. But don’t pretend it’s not an issue, especially around more graphic images and fake content. 

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“Right now is a good opportunity to teach your kids how to navigate the internet safely and responsibly. Instead of removing social media, take some time and explain that engaging with violent content helps the bad guys. It enables evil by rewarding disinformers and bad actors with views and clicks,” Mahadevan said. 

Don't try to avoid the topic, Stillner adds.

“Avoidance has limited longevity with kids. The more you restrict something, the more they want to seek it out and the more channels they have to do so,” Stillner said.

He noted that some parental apps now use AI to flag concerning content, helping parents navigate a sensitive subject without kids fearing they’ll get their device taken away.

“Get ahead of the violent videos and misinformation they may see online. Kids shouldn’t have to navigate the Internet on their own. It’s a complicated and messy place,” Stillner said.

I also found a great deal of helpful information researching this topic for this story. Here are several additional resources: 

• How to avoid misinformation about the war in Gaza: Mahadevan highlights ways to spot fake news and manipulated videos. 

• Filter content and keep videos from autoplaying across social media apps that allow you to turn that feature off (not all of them do). Click on each site to go to its how-to page on this topic.
  • YouTube
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • TikTok
  • X (formerly Twitter)

• Andrea Davis’ book Creating a Tech-Healthy Family is full of practical suggestions as well.